Eugene Melnyk doesn’t understand how the internet works

There cannot be more than 20 people on the internet who think Eugene Melnyk and Peter Dorian are doing a good job. Who think that the Ottawa Senators made the right choice in Brady Tkachuk rather than tanking for Jack Hughes, or that the Uber video wasn’t a devastating hit to the organizations already rapidly diminishing standing as a real franchise in the NHL. And those 20 people are all probably burner accounts belonging to Eugene Melnyk. 

The Ottawa Citizen, the Kris Jenners of the hockey gossip world, are at it again. Breaking news, along with the hearts of the 40 people in Ottawa that still believe in the Sens. Now, it’s a conspiracy, that they believe originated in the front office of Canadian Tire Centre. 

 So, what does this all mean? It means that Eugene Melnyk is a crazy person. But we already knew this. It means that the Ottawa Senators front office have so little confidence in themselves and what they are doing that they are making up fans to cheer them along. Also, old news. But the new information, is that the Ottawa Senators are making a fool of themselves, and the league. And if there is one thing Gary Bettman doesn’t appreciate, its people disrespecting his league. 

Look, I’ve dealt with burner accounts before. Remember Brian Colangelo? He almost ruined the Philadelphia 76ers with fake accounts defending himself, and releasing medical information about his players, breaking HIPA confidentiality? If this was Peter Dorian running these accounts, this would be easy, he would be fired immediately, Ottawa would rejoice, and Eugene Melnyk would bully the next GM into running his team into the ground so they can move somewhere warmer. But it wasn’t Peter, it was Eugene. So here is what is most likely going to happen. 

Gary Bettman, if he decides to do something other than shut down the league for once in his miserable career that is apparently hall of fame worthy, but thats another blog for another time, is going to start an inquiry into the fake accounts. Eugene will find someone, either in the front office, or in his family (Brian Colangelo used his wife) to take the blame for the accounts and say he had no knowledge of them. If the scapegoat is in his front office, that person will be fired immediately. If the person is in his family, Eugene will pretend to take a step away from the team, by hiding in his office where he watches everything anyone does ‘Big Brother’ style. 

I get it Sens fans, your organization is a joke, all of your good players are leaving, and your owner is trying to reenact the plot to ‘Major League’. But look on the bright side, maybe now the Melnyk family will finally sedate Eugene, and you can tank the way that God intended, with all of the Canadian media watching. 

to read the entire Ottawa Citizen Article: Click Here